Wednesday, October 31, 2007


Halloween: it’s not funny, and it’s not fun.

Evil is real: encouraged as a child to watch horror films and to be entertained by various deeds of darkness, I also had nightmares nearly every night of my young life.
[I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me. -Psalm 101:3]

Witchcraft is real: witches will celebrate their god and his power today.

Devils are real: those poor souls who believe they’re communicating with dead people are dancing with demons. This is not a nice party and without repentance will lead to eternal separation from God.

Death is real: I watched my daddy, my sister, my mother-in-law, and my mother die. Someone, anyone, derives pleasure from images and costumes mimicking the dead or death? Wretched. God
[whose name is YHWH -- not to be confused with Higher Power (aka Self) or Allah or Buddha or Maitreya or any other of the many gods] have mercy. Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.

Halloween: not my idea of fun. Not for me. Ugly.

When thou art come into the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not learn to do after the abominations of those nations. There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch, Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer. For all that do these things are an abomination unto the Lord: and because of these abominations the Lord thy God doth drive them out from before thee. -Deuteronomy 18:9-12

And Nadab and Abihu, the sons of Aaron, took either of them his censer, and put fire therein, and put incense thereon, and offered strange fire before the Lord, which he commanded them not. And there went out fire from the Lord, and devoured them, and they died before the Lord. -Leviticus 10:1, 2

For I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.
~ II Timothy 1:12 \o/

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Stock Tip

You have 4 hours and 47 minutes to buy stock in a company manufacturing latex paint remover and give me notice of the brand to buy.

The new patio Son3 and I laid last spring

The pillar I painstakingly painted in varying shades
of one color last autumn

One small section of one long sidewalk
It was pretty piggledy even before the overspray.

That brand new (speckled) smoker

Looks to me like a full-blown SPILL

We are not good painters.

God is a good painter.

So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. For ye shall go out with joy and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands. ~Isaiah 55:11, 12

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Nice, Normal Family

Why is this a recurring theme in my blog?

Activities like this little gem by OAO Son-In-Law and his wife punctuate the necessity of the proclamation (/attempt to convince) *snort*.

But he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast.
~Proverbs 15:15b

Friday, October 26, 2007

CowNots & Cookies

Let Nothing Come Between a CowNot and Her Cookies

CowNots Mesmerized by Magical Flying Cookies

Drop One in This Slot, Would Ya?

More Cookies Coming

Mmmm, Cookies

Girls, Be Polite

Nancy & Nellie Are Polite

Florence Is Impolite
A Pig in CowNotSkin
Florence Must Be Restrained

Elemeno Is a Trick CowNot
Elemeno Dances for Cookies

Grace and peace be multiplied unto you through
the knowledge of God, and of Jesus our Lord.
II Peter 1:2

Saturday, October 20, 2007

A Wall

It is one. A little anticlimactic and absent the drama we experienced when wielding sledge hammers, leaning on pry bars, clearing the den floor with a shovel, wheeling barrow after barrow of rock and mortar, and toting a chimney out the back door.

A wall: ho-hum.

And we painted 2,457 miles of fence today. Okay, it seemed like that much. With 30 mph winds, we also painted trees, bushes, sidewalks, the (used to be new) patio, the (formerly pristine) smoker, ourselves, and lots and lots of grass. Oopsie. When a Saturday in mid-October provides temperatures conducive to painting a nekked new fence, what's a little wind?

I've inhaled enough sheetrock dust, cement dust, oak dust, and paint spray to cough up a two-bedroom bungalow. Guest house!

Someone let the dog into the house while I was poly coating the floor, so the dog's stiff now. That's what we can look at, the stiff dog. Be right back...

Hmm, looks like we sorta spray painted him too. Who knew? My dear friend Willow polled some smart doggie people and gave me some good tips for unstiffening PolyPierre. I'm going to try a coconut oil soak first, which in tandem with a brushing is sure to work on at least the paint freckles. I just don't know, though, about that stiff fur.

Poor Charles has been trying all day to get a couple of slabs of ribs to cook in that new (speckled) smoker. He says he's hoping for something edible at 8:30 p.m. I hope I can stay awake long enough to gnaw on a few bones. Starving is my just recompense for messing with one of a man's favorite toys.

I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep:
for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety.
~Psalm 4:8

Thursday, October 18, 2007

NanaCam - Bedtime

Wear 'Em Out
Rile 'Em Up

C'mon, pick me up.

I'm gettin' crazy here -- pick me up!

What's up with this?

Naaa-na, I'm swee-eet.


For though there be that are called gods, whether in heaven or in earth, (as there be gods many, and lords many,) but to us there is but one God, the Father, of whom are all things, and we in him; and one Lord Jesus Christ, by whom are all things, and we by him. ~1 Corinthians 8:5-6

Monday, October 15, 2007

It's All My Fault

...and I'm gonna be in really big trouble when Charles discovers this post. If the photo illustration disappears, you'll know he found it. *ducking & running* See, it's like this...

Charles is the greatest smoker and griller in the world. So when his birthday rolled around last month, we decided to reward him with a new, upgraded smoker: larger, heavier, more handsome. He was happy, of course, but made the teensiest noises about needing to learn a new piece of equipment now; he had the old one pegged to a fine cooking art. Oooh, I hadn't thought of that!

Enter the trial turkey.

I was deeply embroiled in a most dramatic (everything is dramatic in my world) phone conversation with dear Mrs. Piecrust, when I saw Charles approaching with his smoked prize. Assuming he wanted to display for me the lovely bird, and not really wanting to have my attention diverted from the conversation at that moment, I squinched my eyes shut and made an ucky-wife face, postponing the viewing. *bad wife - bad wife*

Imagine my shock when moments later I strolled to the kitchen and saw this:

Boy, did I feel guilty.
I did this when I bought that new smoker.

"I have to take pictures!"

"Son3 already did. I made him delete them. He's going to ruin my reputation."

"Oh please, please. This is too funny!" And the bad wife got her way, the little beggar.

Now, we're accustomed to the blackening which occurs when smoking meats, but this was approaching cinders. Just look at that black, shriveled wing and the dry, gaggy, stick-in-the-throat striations of exposed breast meat.

Charles decided to go ahead and rip the bird apart, searching for surviving, edible parts, and that's when we discovered we mustn't judge a turkey by its cinder-skin. Every bite of that bird was the tastiest, most succulent and tender, please-the-palate turkey we've ever et. Go figure! Over time and with trials, Charles will tweak turkeys until they're truly picture-perfect again. In the meantime, we don't care what they look like, as long as they remain as scrumptious as Ugly #1.

Reputation Intact, Charles!

For I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. ~Philippians 4:11-13

Sunday, October 14, 2007

It's a Wall -- Almost

That little sheetrock patch in the ceiling was one sheetrock patch more than anyone living in this house wanted to do, so we've a beadboard wall in the den. Beats the cornbread heck out of that gaping chimney hole, and we'll just call it our accent wall (accentuating how much we abhor the task of sheetrocking).

My contribution to this portion of the project was to absent myself from the scene, especially since I'm fixated on straight and level lines, and no one needed a compulsive voice yammering about right angles.

Knitting -- ya gotta love it. Get to sit on one's tail-end, accomplishing something. Guilt-free relaxation. So I knitted and ate cookies, then I ate cookies and knitted. (Cookies can be eaten in any posture; seated is particularly pleasing.)

I'm the painter, by default, so my time's a-comin'. But for a missing 12" x 15" piece of beadboard, I'd have been roller in-hand by nightfall, and I have a sneaking suspicion that remaining, bitsy piece shall be applied this very day.

*Knit 1, Roll 3; repeat from (*) to the end of the wall (or exhaustion -- whichever comes first).

Boast not thyself of to morrow;
for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth.
~Proverbs 27:1

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Demolition - Day 2

Demolition Fear Scale: 1 - 10
10 = Hire someone who knows what they're doing,
so we won't knock the house down

Remodeling Tip: Plan and aim your swing with a sledge hammer, because knuckles crunched against mortar don't fare so well. A second mauled knuckle, though, will convince one to don work gloves.

Stones and mortar vanquished from the scene:

Fear Factor: 9

It's Coming Down
Fear Factor: 9½
When the elbow was out, I poked my head into the recess and under the chimney to view the warping which prompted this bitsy project and got an eyeful of chimney dirt to go with my flayed knuckles. Oopsie.

It's Out
Fear Factor: nosedives to 3

Remodeling Tip: Always check the interior parts of the shop vac to be sure the filter is still attached, lest you suck crumbled mortar and sheetrock dust into the hose and blow it out the other side of the vac, creating cumulus clouds in the adjoining room.

Is it pretty yet?

Fear factor: 2

Hope factor: 7 - stay tuned...


The LORD is compassionate and gracious, Slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness. He will not always strive with us; Nor will He keep His anger forever. For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him. As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us. ~ Psalms 103:8-12

Sunday, October 7, 2007


by Timothy Dwight

I love Thy kingdom, Lord,
The house of Thine abode,
The church our blessed Redeemer saved
With His own precious blood.

If e’er to bless Thy sons
My voice or hands deny,
These hands let useful skills forsake,
This voice in silence die.

Should I with scoffers join
Her altars to abuse?
No! Better far my tongue were dumb,
My hand its skill should lose.

For her my tears shall fall
For her my prayers ascend,
To her my cares and toils be given
Till toils and cares shall end.

Jesus, Thou Friend divine,
Our Savior and our King,
Thy hand from every snare and foe
Shall great deliverance bring.


I was speaking with a business person in town yesterday, and her explanation of mandated business practices was laced with because of the terrorists, terror, security, terrorists, terrorists, because of the terrorists, security. Because I'm in no rush to be ushered to camp, I just listened, although I did finally say, "I just think it's a shame that we all became the terrorist suspects. I don't think I look dangerous. You don't look dangerous either."

I left the conversation with a renewed sense of resignation to the way things are and giving thanks again that my citizenship is in God's kingdom.

Let us never tolerate outrageous conspiracy theories concerning the attacks of September the 11th; malicious lies that attempt to shift the blame away from the terrorists themselves, away from the guilty.
~President George W. Bush
UN General Assembly, November 10, 2001
The Looniest of All 9/11 Conspiracy Theories - Although this little piece covers only a fraction of the issues balled-up in the unbelievable, outrageous conspiracy theory, it struck my fancy and would have even amused me had the referenced debacle not been the most swarthy, sulfurous, deceitful, grievous, and ongoing event of our time.

Sometimes the truth is hard to bear, even nearly inconceivable.

Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. Ye shall know them by what they say their fruits.1 Let them alone: they be blind leaders of the blind. And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch.2 Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.3 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God [truth - righteousness - gospel of peace - faith - salvation - the word of God - prayer] that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.4

1) Matthew 7:15-16a
2) Matthew 15:14
3) I John 2:15, 16
4) Ephesians 6:10-13

Thy throne, O God, is for ever and ever: the sceptre of thy kingdom is a right sceptre. ~Psalms 45:6

Saturday, October 6, 2007

I Love a Parade

This was the day of the annual wee village wee parade.

My eyes were abrim with tears threatening to rain on my parade,
when the band stopped and played the Star Spangled Banner
in front of the flag at the post office:
what was, what is no more, what is

a horse - a dog - a man - a dog


There was a horse and wagon.

And then joy overflowing:

It was there in 2004.
It was missing in 2005 and 2006.
I was sad.
It came back this year!
My favorite:

The Speckled Ox

I nigh-on covet that huge, granite cow.

Let them praise the name of the LORD:
for his name alone is excellent;
his glory is above the earth and heaven.
~Psalm 148:13

~*~ Redecorating ~*~

We're good at this!

P . R . E . T . T . Y

Well, it needs a few little finishing touches.
Yes, be scared. Be very scared.

He hath made every thing beautiful in his time.
Ecclesiastes 3:11a

Friday, October 5, 2007

Uninvited Guest

Fluxing between being grossed out and amazed, I grabbed the camera for a record of this breakfast guest.

Fifty-four years old, and I've never before seen a woolly worm indoors, much less munching on bananas.

Where might the winter weather prognosticators run with this one? I ran it out the back door.

Ay Day on Thee Farm

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. I am the vine, ye [are] the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing. ~ John 15:4-5

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Miss MannersNot

See, I'd taken the bammy in for a medical check-up this morning, and it seems the phone was ringing with abandon in my absence: Unknown - Unknown - Blah-Blah Barnes (unknown to me) - Unknown. I fail to appreciate a caller ID system which is sitting somewhere sending me messages like, "Uhh, I don't know who it is." And we pay for this?

My dear piecrust-crimpin' friend had said she'd call later this week, and it's later this week, so I assumed it was she who called, and I gave her a ring. Actually, I was bustin' all over to tell her about my adventures with the bammy this morning anyway. He and I had sailed well through the appointment with the doc, then when he'd stumbled just the teensiest bit while walking down the corridor to leave, I quipped that if he was going to fall, this was the place to do it. Ever have someone hang too heavily on your words?

I'd worn a full, gored skirt today and had learned heading into the medical building that my skirt aspired to become a head scarf on this breezy day. So I wadded and clutched it tightly in my fists as we exited the building and was walking ahead of the bammy when I heard the telltale "Ooooh" followed by something like "kaloomph" and turned to see our bammy lying on the grassy ground edging the parking lot. Ew boy, do I pick him up, and am I going to be able to see when I let go of my skirt, and it becomes a head-dressing? As I was making the more moral and selfless (yet perhaps more humiliating) decision, and released one side of my skirt to extend a hand, people appeared out of nowhere to help me scoop our bammy off the ground. I reckon that small crowd served as a wind block, and I remained appropriately clothed. God is good.

A survey of bammy body parts and a trial effort at walking proved we needn't turn around and reenter the medical building. And before we'd made it to the van, I decided we should stop by the plant to see Charles and introduce our bammy to his son's work environment. Yes, he'd been there before, but every experience is new to him minute-by-minute, and I thought he'd enjoy seeing the place (again). Besides, I just felt like I could use a little *there-there* from the big guy after the parking lot trauma, and I was looking a little bit cute today; my sweater and the floaty (over my heady) skirt were a matched set and the eyeliner had flowed on perfectly this morning.

Home safe and having cycled through the caller beats me! log, I rang up the dear pie-crimper and got her answering machine. "It's just me calling to see if you've been calling me this morning. If not..." and that's when A MAN answered the phone! Yes, she's married, and yes, I know that, but I wasn't expecting him to be home today. Caught totally off guard, I said, "Oh no! Who are you?" I know who I are -- I are the ditzy friend several states away who's about to get fired for being rude to the pie-crimper's husband. Yes indeed, my mother taught me, "Hello, this is Miss Manners. May I speak with ___, please?" I'd made it home with my cute skirt, but I think I left my peabrain on the asphalt in front of the medical building.

He soon passed me off to "this crazy redhead here." Honest to Pete, I think that's what he called her, and I could hear the enamored smile on his face as he referenced his lovely wife. Maybe he'll overlook my foible and allow his beloved, crazy redhead to retain her bottled-brunette, bozo friend.

Then said Jesus unto them again, Verily, verily, I say unto you, I am the door of the sheep. All that ever came before me are thieves and robbers: but the sheep did not hear them. I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture. ~John 10:7-9

Monday, October 1, 2007

I Tried to Be Good

"Wanna go shopping now?" I asked Son2, who'd overnighted with us and was spending the day on the plains.

"Sure, sounds good!"

So I hit the road with Son2 and the SugarPlum, and we shopped for more than an hour without me doing a single idiotic thing. The produce section is always the last stop before the check-out, and I eyed that vegetable misting system which got me into hot water with Son3, thinking to myself, "I've made it through the whole store without humiliating this one." When they live with you, they're stuck with your antics. The grown ones, though, can choose whether or not they're going to subject themselves to this and how often.

I kept my eye on those large, red, steel pillars as we exited the store, and as an insurance policy, I'd given the SugarPlum a couple of quarters, so she could ride the pony on a pedestal. If I didn't make it to the van without incident, Son2 would never know, as he was overseeing his little girl's ride into the wild blue nowhere.

With a cart overflowing -- sure can cram a lot of stuff in the cart in an hour -- I was loading the last few sacks when Son2 and SugarPlum reached the van, so he manned those bags for me, while I walked to the driver's side to poke the paper towels into the center of the van.

Just as I slid between my van and the little red sports car, the annoying blewwhh - blewwhh - blewwhh- ... of the car alarm sounded loudly in my ear, so I knew people in the huge parking lot had to be looking at me. Drawing attention to myself is one of my most dreaded and avoided situations.

Maybe it was the sense of security I feel when in the company of my grown sons which allowed me to display a nonchalant attitude about having set off the alarm on that little red sports car. "La-la," I thought. "What sort of nutcase set their alarm to sound in a parking lot if someone came within 2 feet of their car? The car's not all that cute anyway. I don't care if it blares till the cows come home!" And as long as that thing had been going off, there was probably at least one cow about to make it.

Then I heard from the other side of the van, where Son2 was strapping in SugarPlum, "Mom, that's you."


"That's you."

"What's me?"

"That's your car."

"Oh," and I just started nowhere. Where's that stiff pony when you need it!? I needed to get away from that noise and from all the faces staring at me.

Fortunately, Son2 trapped me near the rear of my van and grabbed for my purse, where he'd spied my keyless entry thing dangling from the little snappety thing, where I can get to it easily, and apparently where I'd squeezed it when I lifted those paper towels from the cart. In a dizzied daze, I watched as he poked a button that said PANIC. Panic -- hey, that's an appropriate label.

He'll be back, because I fed him a juicy, char-grilled burger and baked him cookies. I don't know, though, what'll happen if I ask, "Hey, you wanna go shopping?"

He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence. He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler. ~Psalms 91:1-4