Marital BlissNot

or

How Old Married Folks Plan Their Piggledy Meals

Charles: I feel like smoking something today.

CarolineNot: We don't have any meat thawed.

Charles: I think I'll do ribs. I wouldn't want to put them on until noon, anyway, and they'd thaw by then.

CarolineNot: Nuh-uh.

Charles: Yeah, I'll put them in the van. That'll heat 'em right up.

CarolineNot: *gasp* You're gonna kill us!

Charles: *satisfied chuckle* And we need to have some of that corn.

CarolineNot: (in her best pouty voice) I don't want no little-bitty, unripened corn.

Charles: Oh, it's ripe. A lot of it's ready to eat.

CarolineNot: Nuh-uh.

Charles: Oh, you don't know anything about corn.

For how great [is] his goodness, and how great [is] his beauty!

corn shall make the young men cheerful, and new wine the maids.

Zechariah 9:17

Chick Jammies

Too tired to wiggle by Friday evening, I postponed the planned trip into town to purchase a new heat lamp bulb for the chicks and hoped they'd fare well overnight with just a regular light bulb for heat. They did...whew!

Confessing my slothfulness and reporting to OAO Daughter that the chicks survived, she suggested I make pajamas for the chicks and forget about the heat bulb.

"Yeah, I could do that." I could use the flannel fabric I bought last December to make my then-expected and now 4-month-old grand-nephew a blanket. "...You know, a blanket which requires only seaming together two pieces of fabric and binding them. Sure, I should use that fabric to make jammies for 35 chicks. That's going to happen."

Maybe there will be a blanket by the time the snow flies. And if I ever sit down to weave in the loose ends of the one I knitted for the little guy, he'll have that one too.

Someone smack that saucy little girl for me. She must take after her dad.

And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us:

and establish thou the work of our hands upon us;

yea, the work of our hands establish thou it.

Psalm 90:17

"The Reformed Dumpster Diver" or "Boopsie Gets a Friend"

When Uncle Kemtrail reached his forties, moved away from a college town (where semester breaks create wonderful "trash"), and wasn't quite so agile any more, the reformed dumpster diver became a garage sale addict, so Friday and Saturday mornings, we all wait eagerly for him to stop by for coffee and show us the bargains he's nabbed.

Today's finds included a great wall hanging for his home:

I was on the phone when he arrived this morning and let himself through the back door, near where I was seated at the time. Because I was having a phone conversation, and because he was clutching to himself a rather large ball of fur, he didn't get a verbal greeting, a wave, or even a smile. My brows were knitted, as I tried to determine whether or not there was life in that furry bundle.

At the conclusion of that phone call, I discovered he'd brought me a minky-looking teddy bear, and when I commented specifically on liking the bear's eyes, I explained that I'm smitten with close-set teddy bear eyes, and I really don't like wide-set ones.

"Well, Boopsie has wide-set eyes, doesn't he?"

"Yes, I suppose he does, but that's different," and the mention of this old friend prompted me to open my closet door and take from his perch my beloved Boopsie, who many decades ago had much of his fur loved off and lost his voice, though his belly-held, exhausted larynx is now prominent in his furless, compacted body.

"How old is he now, or do you even know?" inquired Uncle Kemtrail.

"Sure, he's 53."

"Wow, you should take him to the Antiques Road Show or something," said Uncle Kemtrail, which prompted Charles to display for us the disgust with which the appraisers would lift him from me, holding my friend by the ear and as distant from their airspace as possible. Poor Boopsie.

Uncle Kemtrail, still examining Boopsie, said, "What'd you do, bite his toenails or something?"

"Uh-huh. I chewed most of them off; gave him a manicure and a pedicure." I remember doing it. I don't remember why I did it. My sister was a nailbiter. I reckon I preferred Boopsie's to my own.

I'm reminded now of a song I learned in Brownies:

Make new friends

But keep the old

One is silver

And the other gold

A [good] name [is] rather to be chosen than great riches,

[and] loving favour rather than silver and gold.

Proverbs 22:1

~*~Peeps~*~

At 6:51 a.m., I got that much-anticipated phone call from the postmistress: "You have a box of chicks here." Since I'd dragged my sorry self out of bed to answer the phone, I told her I'd be there in about 45 minutes, knowing it would take me that long to accomplish the rigors required, so I wouldn't look so very scary when I arrived at the post office. Niece Kate would say I used the time betwixt phone call and departure to work my Oprah-magic, but she'd say it just to watch me squirm and hear me moan. [<--- a little UNFUNNY inside joke there for dear Katie's benefit)

It was already 74º when I loaded the box into the van, but that's fully 20º lower than the recommended temp for chicks, so I cranked up the heater in the van. The chicks were happy; I glistened all the way home.

The little peepers are nestled into the newly created brooder section of the chicken coop and are seeming peepily happy, which is a more positive report than I can give today regarding the hens' and rooster's reaction to this noisy invasion of their space. They were curiously interested at best and ticked off at worst, as they took turns perching above and peering down into the chick space. I couldn't discern whether they were plotting a bloody rebellion or performing the tasks of a welcoming committee, so Son3 got a broom and whisked them all outdoors. We netted the ceiling of the brooder just in case.

It's a happy day on the higgledy-piggledy farm.

This [is] the day [which] the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Psalm 118:24

Drive-Thru Perils

Since the family-favored fast food restaurants are a block apart, I stopped first to get spicy chicken, onion rings, and red beans and rice to deliver to Charles at work as a surprise. Son3 suggested I do the drive-thru, but I abhor those machines that speak gobbledygook, so I parked and placed the order indoors without much ado.

Not wanting Charles' food to cool, I next braved the talking box at the fish joint, and boy-howdy did I regret that:

I'll have 4 fries, 4 chickens, and 5 fish.

Okay, that'll be 4 fries, 5 chickens, and 4 fish.

No, 4 chickens and 5 fish.

Oh, okay -- 4 fish and 5 chickens. [Was this groundhog hour, a dyslexic talking box, or WHAT?]

No, 4 chickens - 5 fish.

Okay, lkeoidvm ckadie pkdfmkd (tractor-trailer rig drove by, drowning and halting the insanity) and pull up to the window.

There was a long, stagnant line at the window, and the Sugar Plum had pulled the rubber band out of her ponytail again, so I leapt from the van, hairbrush in hand, and raced around to the other side, so I could re-tail her wispy 'do before she visited Poppie in the workplace. Wouldn't you know it, the line decided to move just then, so I treated everyone to what must have been perceived as a one-(idiot)woman Chinese fire drill, jogging all the way around the van, and back into the driver's seat without skipping a beat. Ew boy.

So we delivered Charles' tasty meal, and I consigned myself to the rest of us having guess-whats for lunch. Guess what. We actually and thankfully had 4 chickens and 5 fish. I kinda think, though, it would have been easier and less stressful to just go home and cook lunch.

When I consider thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars, which thou hast ordained; What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him? For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour. Thou madest him to have dominion over the works of thy hands; thou hast put all [things] under his feet: All sheep and oxen, yea, and the beasts of the field; The fowl of the air, and the fish of the sea, [and whatsoever] passeth through the paths of the seas. O LORD our Lord, how excellent [is] thy name in all the earth! ~Psalm 8:3-9